Recently Madeline has taken to shutting me in places. Mostly the bathroom and the pantry. Unfortunately, she doesn't quite grasp the idea that shutting the door will make me inaccessible until after she's done it. Then she raises the roof because I have ABANDONED her. Which was cruel of me. Almost as cruel as refusing to let her eat toilet paper or changing her poopy diapers. Clearly, I am a sadistic mother. On a good note, she thinks I am nice when I let her drink ice water and pour it down her clothes, or when I let her have bits of chocolate when I am sneaking Kit Kat bars. So our relationship is stable for now.
In other news, Jessie bought me a present which was shipped to our house today. I keep trying to get him to tell me what it is, but he's rather reticent to spill the beans. Which I think is kind of hypocritical, considering he wanted me to tell him where I hid his presents so that he wouldn't accidentally find them. I have gotten him to reveal that he has NOT bought me a sewing machine. Which I need, but don't really want because it would force me to be domestic. He wouldn't comment on whether he had bought me a live dolphin. I think I might be on to something there.
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