Fun with small, moody children

So all my hinting must have paid off, because they called me to nursery. I'm pretty excited. Maybe I'm crazy, because I know a lot of people think nursery is a trial. Maybe I'm still naive about that. But I think anyplace where you play with toys and eat snacks can't be half bad. So no more Sunday school or relief society for me for a while. I'll be learning how to be reverent and smile at people and listen to my mother. Apparently I never figured those things out.

Probably to prepare me for my new calling, Madeline has put me through the paces this week. She had her eighteen month appointment this week, and apparently that was not her favorite thing. Over the last five days she's had two days of fever, a mysterious short-lived skin rash, bruising from the shots, two days of non-stop crankiness and kicking and screaming tantrums, and no coherent sleeping schedule, except for consistency in waking up before six every morning. Also a smashed hand and a basketball landing on her head. Pretty awesome week, huh? But she's perky and happy today, so things are looking up. I was starting to think she broke a mirror or spilled some salt or something. Come to think of it, she's done both those things a few times. But she's a tough cookie, so don't worry about her. Worry about all the broken mirrors and spilled salt we'll have to replace. That could get costly.

Madeline. And libraries.

Madeline had her eighteen month appointment yesterday. It was fun and excitement all around. Well, for those of us who didn't get shots. Madeline is growing despite eating mostly goldfish and spaghetti, and she does all the charming things an eighteen month old should do, like destroying things, climbing onto high surfaces in hopes of falling off, and saying no a lot. Unfortunately, she had to get immunizations and a flu shot (normal, not swine. Good luck getting a swine flu shot right now.). So now she has a fever and life is sad. But at least she won't die of pertussis.

In other fun and exciting news, we officially got a new library card yesterday. So now I can start reading all the books I've been hearing good things about for the past three months and couldn't get a hold of, because I was a poor library cardless person. The problem is, I've forgotten all the books I wanted to read, so I just checked out a bunch I've read before. I'm a chronic re-reader. I need some new material. Because if I read the Work and the Glory series one more time, Jessie will think I'm crazy. Any suggestions are welcome. Suggestions submitted with a plate of butterscotch oatmeal cookies will receive a higher rank on my reading list.

Teaching is our new favorite hobby.

So. I haven't gotten a calling yet in our new ward. It's been almost three months, so I've been waiting for the shoe to drop. I still don't have one, even after dropping hints about how much I love sluffing Sunday school and hanging with small children and eating snacks to the primary presidency and nursery leader. But this week I'm talking in sacrament on Sunday and teaching Sunbeams. So I have to go get some lessons ready, which I'm procrastinating. I don't feel too bad, because Jessie has to take a test tomorrow, prepare his talk for scarament meeting, prepare a lesson for Elder's quorum, and prepare a lesson for home teaching. That'll show him for getting his favorite calling.

The rare Picture Post. Enjoy.

I guess it's been a long time since I put any pictures on my blog. I don't really feel too fussed. That's not what my blog is for. But I shall break the visual silence with some photographical evidence of our Halloween spirit. We carved pumpkins for FHE last night (we are apostates and do it on Tuesday due to Jessie's silly urge to get an education on Monday nights. Men.) Madeline had a lot of fun, although she was a little reluctant to touch the seeds at first. And even though she drew a masterpiece on her pumpkin, Dad refused to follow intstructions and just cut out a pumpkin face. The nerve. Anyway, here is Madeline being really excited and cute.

And here she is, going after her seeds somewhat reluctantly.

Here are the finished products. Note how cool and spirited I am. Jessie's is the one they'll be using as a relief society centerpiece next Sunday. And I think Madeline's needs no explanation.

Jessie went forth and carved with much zeal.

In other news, Jessie and I went on a date last weekend. A real date where you get a baysitter and spend a little money and such. Jessie decided to take me skating. Funny story. I don't skate. Which is really ironic, because our second first date (long story), where we decided we were cool people and should date, we went ice skating. And I was fearless. We were country dancing on the ice and running at each other, and I feel down twenty times and didn't care. We went ice skating a few months later, when we were engaged, and I was a complete chicken. It was one of our most lackluster dates ever. I told Jessie that someone upstairs obviously intervened and gave me twenty times my normal balance and daring in order to make our first date a blast so we would date and get married. He didn't believe me at first. But after taking me skating again, he's starting to come around. Jessie is now a firm believer that our first date was a miracle designed to trick him into marrying me. Pretty good trick, huh? Anyway, here's a couple pictures showing my extreme discomfort and Jessie watching me be a wimp.

We did not plan the matching colors. Also, I want you to know, there was much speculation as to whether I could take a picture and stand on roller blades at the same time. But we all lived. Even when I dropped my bracelet. I just sat staring down at it for a few minutes until some 8 year old kid whizzing by at a hundred miles an hour took pity on me and picked it up. Then we went and sat in a movie theater, which I am much more skilled at. We all have our talents.

I love primary children. They should speak every week.

Sometimes I love fast and testimony meetings. Especially when Madeline eats everyone's else's snacks instead of her own and leaves me ducking for cover under the pew so no one will know it's my kid screaming "more" at the boy behind her who is smuggling her teddy grahams. But yesterday, there was a better reason to love testimony meeting. Here's a snippet of two testimonies by a couple of primary boys, one after the other:

Boy #1: And I love my family, even though they hurt me sometimes. (Long pause.) But I love my family.

Boy #2: I'd like to bear my testimony that this true church is the true church, and it is the only true and living church, and other churches, they have different names, but this true church...(pause)...has a really good name for the only true church. Amen.

Guy sitting in front of us, to his wife: What is the bishop teaching these kids?

I was a straight A student in high school. This is important to remember.

I had one of those days. Where I wonder if I still have a brain in there somewhere. I wasn't going to blog about it, but Jessie told me if I didn't, he was going to proclaim himself guest blogger of the day, and he knows all my passwords. Dratted marriage and the spilling of my secrets. Anyway, my day is best summarized by this little anecdote:

I went to Smith's Marketplace to pick up some odds and ends, including such interesting things as lightbulbs and fruit. Madeline was being awesome, and other people were enjoying watching me chase her through women's lingerie, yelling at her to put down the bras in her hands. She also dumped out her goldfish in the shoe section, the produce section, and at the checkout stand, respectively. My apologies, Smith's janitors. So I was a little flustered when I got up to the stand, and as soon as the girl had rung up my stuff, I put it all back into my cart before she could bag it. When I was almost done, I realized she was giving me a weird look, and she asked if I wanted her to bag my stuff. I said yes, thinking she was referring to my lightbulbs, and then realized she meant all the groceries I'd just put in my cart. I was too embarrassed to admit I was losing my mind, so I pretended I meant to do it all along and assured her I didn't want bags. To save the environment. Except my lightbulbs. Because they are more important than the environment. And then I loaded all my stuff into my trunk, sans bags, and when I got home, I brought out my own bags and loaded the stuff into them so I could take it into the house.

We won't talk about how I went to a baby shower and forgot to bring the present.

It's days like this that I just want to go stare at my college diploma on the wall so I can remember that I had rational thought, once.

Welcome to my new wacky world of pink. For now.

So apparently my blog needed a makeover. Also a few rooms in my house and probably myself, but we're going to just stick to what's feasible here. So I don't know if I like it or not. Apparently I was feeling girly when I picked the template. This may change if I should suddenly get the desire to beat someone up or watch NFL football. But for now, enjoy something different. Please make lots of comments about how you love the weird picture of Jessie's face right at the top of the header. He'll be so grateful for the attention.

Speaking of Jessie, he interpreted his Spanish recipe for empanadas last night so we could make them and feel ethinic and special. They were pretty yummy, although Madeline wouldn't eat them. She wants to make it very clear that she is American, thank you very much, and as such must subsist on hot dogs and pasta and yogurt and goldfish crackers and cookies. Because that is the most American diet you could ever hope for. She also likes to fall off things, though where she got the idea this is the American way, I do not know. I just know that she likes to jump off three foot platforms at the park if you're not watching, cry for ten seconds, and then get mad at you for comforting her instead of letting her leap onto swinging red circles of doom. Clearly my daughter has not yet developed that part of her brain that is responsible for saying DANGER WILL ROBINSON. Just the part that says MINE.

Our weekend

So it's been a good weekend. I ate a lot of chocolate, saw an entire session of conference without interruption, and won a game of Phase 10 while half asleep. We went up to my parent's for the second half of conference, and while the boys were at priesthood, I went with my sister to sing with a bunch of young single adults. Apparently the church likes to get young single adult wards to sing outside temple square while people are coming and going from Conference, so that people feel spiritual instead of feeling like arguing with protesters. My sister's ward was one of these, and since they were supposed to contribute eighty people and had about than ten, I pretended to not be married and went with them. (To defend the turnout, you have to remember they were singing as people left priesthood session, so no boys were able to make it, and their ward is pretty small.) It was fun, although my voice was hoarse by the end. We didn't really get hassled by protesters because it was late, but I swear as we were leaving there was a guy standing on the corner preaching against Evil Mormon Driving Practices. I didn't know you could protest against that, or I would have gotten me a permit and joined him.

On Sunday, because we sang, we got some tickets to the afternoon session, and my sister gave hers to Jessie so we could go. That was pretty awesome because a) Madeline had limited my prior uninterrupted Conference viewing to approximately 1.5 talks and b) we got to be there for Elder Holland's extremely powerful talk on the Book of Mormon, which I loved. Also, we rode Trax for about three blocks, because Jessie really wanted to. And got off at the wrong stop. But Jessie got his ride. So it was an awesome weekend. Hope yours was slightly awesome also.

Hi. We're just being cold. How are you?

Hi. I'm alive. I just haven't done anything terribly exciting or had a creative thought for a week. That would depress me, but I made my favorite cookies yesterday, so I'm good. Plus, it's finally cold out, which makes me a lot more willing to just curl up in a blanket with Madeline and be lazy. Not that Madeline knows how to be lazy, but I'm trying to teach her. It's one of many things on our list, like saying "please", not skipping one when we count to three, and sitting still for longer than two minutes. Because apparently this is a skill they like in nursery.

Did I mention Madeline is in nursery? It's pretty much awesome.

We stuck her in last week, one week early, to get her used to it. Okay, that's a lie, because she'd get used to it just fine if we waited until she was actually 18 months. We did it because she's a terror and we want someone else to watch our kid while we get to listen to a lesson. I admit it. But in our defense, she's really pretty easy. She loves kids and toys, and the only snag was apparently a moment during singing time when she didn't want to sit and pay attention. Surprise. She even said thank you when she got a snack. I felt fulfilled as a mother. Whatever behavioral problems my daughter has, she's at least polite. I don't know what to do with my new found freedom. But I'm sure I'll figure it out.