Back street's back, alright!

Wow. You know it's been too long when Jessie realizes you haven't blogged in a while. I have officially become one of those bloggers. How to catch up? Unfortunately, you'll never get back those months of potential wittiness and endless entertainment, and I understand you lament the loss of my riveting world. But maybe it's time for a quick recap of important life events I happen to remember and anything else I think you need to know. Followed by repentance and a renewal of my efforts to be an awesome blogger. Which will probably end up a lot like my attempts to be a responsible library patron who returns books on time and doesn't incur fines. Welp. What we've been up to:

• Ear infections. A lot of ear infections. This is at the top of my mind because Kimberly has officially exceeded maximum ear infection danger zone red, which is the arbitrary point at which we get sick of watching our kid scream and suffer, and instead opt to traumatize her in hopes of a better tomorrow. So she's getting ear tubes next week. My mother paranoia knows no bounds. So I'm spending the weekend letting her do whatever she wants and driving Jessie nuts with over planning for the big day. Awesome. She's also getting her adnoids pruned. Hopefully this will put an end to our days of antibiotics and all night parties.
• Crawling. All of us. Spencer has joined the ranks of the mobile. And we're all so impressed we get in on the action whenever we can. The girls enjoy stealing his binky and putting it across the room to test his mad skills. 
• Oh. Our ward split. So Jessie has been doing that. Whatever that is. 
• We enjoyed conference. Madeline enjoys drawing many pictures of the temple, which curiously resembles a normal house with giant multicolored persons on top with funny horns. Kimberly enjoys drawing small lines and circles and insisting each small mark is the prophet, temple, scriptures, or Jesus. Spencer enjoys eating paper.
• Madeline started preschool. Goodness, I almost forgot, because it's been a while since she started. She loves it excessively. She goes next door, so I kick her out of the house and watch her run away in my pajamas. I'm in my pajamas, she's not in my pajamas. In case you were confused. She loves her backpack. She loves her friends. She loves her letters and her millions of art projects. She loves snacks and playtime and singing and basically everything ever. I love going shopping and running errands with one less kid. Win/win all around.
• Jessie and I ran away to Park City and abandoned our children. We went down the Alpine Slide, did some shopping, watched some football, saw our first ever 3D movie (at the dollar theater! Live it up!) and slept in. The perfect weekend. The kids painted their nails and ate treats and went to the park and didn't even miss us. Well, Spencer missed us a little. That's why he's my favorite. (NOTE TO FUTURE ADULT CHILDREN READING: THIS IS A JOKE. I LOVE YOU ALL EQUALLY. YOU ARE ALL MY FAVORITE. ANY THERAPY YOU MAY REQUIRE IS NOT MY FAULT.)
• We're all psyched up because my little brother is coming home from his mission. We made a paper chain, because we are super chain makers and any excuse to cut paper is golden. Madeline is all ready to fly to Chile and pick him up. She is even learning to talk in a Spanish accent. Also, you can bet after conference Madeline is all ready for her mission at nineteen. As long as they send her to Argentina or Chile. And let her bring her baby doll.

Well, that's it. Probably more, but I don't want to exert my brain and remember. Just assume we've been completing many covert missions for the CIA and working hard on our new fashion reality show. We love you all, our many and devoted fans. Thanks for hanging around. We shall reward you with Warner for President bumper stickers for your vehicles.